I don’t need these shoes to be happy.

Item: Chelsea Crew “Master” Oxford Heels

Found: Ruche

Price: $58.99

Rating: 9 out of 10

I know it sounds incredibly petty, but I have been measuring my maturity lately on my style choices. How is this new? I suppose I’ve measured my ENTIRE life on my style choices. But I am at the start of the “Miriam is growing up” era. You’re allowed to laugh out loud as you read my words, but I’m not kidding, my lack of interest in INSANELY tall shoes recently, is my indication that I am very quickly turning into a different person than I used to be. A person who believes there are more important things.

And I continue to change, ladies and gentlemen. Different today than I was yesterday, and SO different today than I was a month ago. I am a teacher. This name has defined me this past month. Not that it will forever, but I am at the starting line in a job that I feel I have been prepared by God my entire life to do. That, my friends, is an overwhelming feeling.

I have thought a few times recently that I should keep a daily journal of the thoughts and happenings of my first year as a classroom teacher. Already, there have been so many stories and adventures, that I laugh and cry just at the thought of them. If I just had more hours in the day, I would be documenting so much more, but time is so precious these days.

The other day on my way home from work, I found myself overwhelmed. Windows down, music up, and bawling. I was praying intensely… “God! Help me! I don’t want to mess these sweet children up! I don’t want my lack of experience to mar them in any way! My job is so fiercely important! How will I ever ever do it well???”

But my Lord is incredibly faithful to calm my heart at the moments I need it most. For one, He has given me the song Shadowfeet by Brooke Fraser, which, I kid you not, I have listened to at least 20 times in the past 24 hours.

Here are some of the lyrics – fitting oh-so-perfectly into my life:

Walking, stumbling on these Shadowfeet
Toward home, a land that I’ve never seen
I am changing, less and less asleep
Made of different stuff than when I began
And I have sensed it all along
Fast approaching is the day

When the world has fallen out from under me
I’ll be found in You, still standing
When the sky rolls up and mountains fall on their knees
When time and space are through
I’ll be found in You.

Even just typing them, those words pump life through my veins.

I am changing. Less and less asleep. Made of different stuff than when I began.

I almost feel as if Jesus reached into my life and said, “Here… let’s mature a bit. Have a new job that’s INFINTELY harder than your last.” Haha.

Well, since I can think of clothing to go along with basically every stage of my life, I will say that these adorable Oxford heels can be my Shadowfeet. They are a fitting shade of grey. But even more importantly, they are shoes I WANT to wear. I think back to another pair of grey heels I posted as my very first blog post ever – so incredibly different from the shoes I’m posting today. How fun to track the changes in one’s life with fashion. 🙂  These just look like shoes worn by someone who is serious.

That’s not to say I’m a serious person. Nobody would believe that for a second! But I’m serious about what I do. Just to think that I have been entrusted with the education of 23 young minds FREAKS me out like you couldn’t imagine. But part of the thrill of it all is that I KNOW that my love and care for those 23 children is going to leave an imprint on their life that will last forever. How cool is that.

Friends, it is worth your every thought, dream and effort to find what you love, then do it. I cannot express with words the feeling of coming home each day, physically and mentally spent beyond belief, but so incredibly satisfied, because you know you have poured every last drop of your energy into what you love. How good it feels to say, “I was born to inspire children, and I do it every day.”

New shoes or no new shoes, tomorrow I get to step back into the career of my dreams. That’s enough for just a blog – never mind the things I want but can’t afford!


3 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Julia Tavis
    Sep 22, 2010 @ 23:40:48

    Mir… about 8 years ago, I owned a pair of shoes just like this, except they were brown and had buttons with elastic loops in place of the laces. Oh, how I wish I had kept them! Do you remember them, by any chance?

    I love this entry and am hoping that you’re keeping Word docs of these so they can be made into a fabulous book (even just a CM hardcover), for your family to enjoy in the years to come.


  2. Kathleen
    Sep 23, 2010 @ 18:01:49

    These are the coolest looking shoes I’ve seen in a very long time


  3. Kathleen
    Sep 23, 2010 @ 18:06:11

    Very cool shoes indeed. Want them in BLACK!


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